By Kimberly Morgan
The Daily Grind
Whether your dad has passed away, you never knew your father, or he is absent from your life, Father's Day likely is painful for you. You observe others buying cards, gifts and planning a big "shindig" for their dad and it hurts. For some, they just get busy and try and forget but for others, the pain is deep.
My own husband grew up in a single-mom household. His dad died when he was a few months old, so he never knew him. He did have wonderful family friends, teachers and an awesome band director, who stood in the gap for a "dad." Thank God for people who stand in the gap for those who need a dad and a role model.
My late daughter, Kristin, knew what it was to long for and plea to God for a dad. Her dad died when she was nine months old. As the years went by, Kristin came to know God as "Abba." Abba is a Hebrew term of endearment for daddy. I saw her change from longing to contentment in her Abba.
I do not know what your situation may be. Your life may be a picturesque, kind of Norman Rockwell sort of life. Enjoy! Live in the moment! Put your cell phone down, or better yet, silence it and turn it over while you enjoy the moment of being with your dad and families. Life can change in a flash. Live in the moment and give praise and accolades now! Give your roses to the living! Happy Father's Day to you and yours.
However, I've been around enough to know that many of you are hurting. For me, a catharsis always has been helping. Helping brings healing to me and it will for you, as well. My thought for those of us who do not have a dad is to celebrate the dads around us instead of retreating into our pity-party pit. Some practical ideas are to:
- Wish the dads you see out a "Happy Father's Day."
- Buy a card or gift for someone who has been like a dad to you.
- Go to a nursing home and visit. Your perspective will change from "woe is me," to "bless their hearts."
- Delineate completely from Father's Day and just be sunshine to someone else. Bake a pie, visit a shut in, make a phone call, in other words - reach out!
- Enjoy your Heavenly "Abba" today by taking a nature walk, talking to him or be his hands and feet to someone else.
Henry Ward Beecher said, "Ice breaks many a branch, and so I see a great many persons bowed down and crushed by their afflictions. But now and then I meet one that sings in affliction, and then I thank God for my own sake as well as his. There is no such sweet singing as a song in the night." It may be night in your soul, but it only takes a little light to break through the darkness.
- Kimberly Morgan is a wife, mother and Hospice Bereavement Counselor. She can be reached via email at email@example.com.